"On Halloween I carved a pumpkin and it had an owl on it. So I was like, 'Dad look,' and he just goes, 'Mmmhmmm,' and then mom was like, 'Do you know what that is?' and he says yea and she says, 'What is it?' and he says 'It's a bird!'" - Submitted by Carly, my sister

"Jessica's boyfriend, Jessica's boyfriend, he hugged me. Twice, he hugged me. He shook my hand and hugged me. I said, "Alright." I think he likes me, Jessica's boyfriend." - your dad on the drive home from work today.

He then serenaded me with his impression of Slipknot. I bet you didn't know he had a Slipknot impression. HE DOES." - Submitted by Michelle M.

Welcome.

No, this is not a rip-off of "Sh*t My Dad Says."
Well, kind of. But not really.
Me, my sister, and most of our family and friends have gotten to enjoy the antics of my dad since, well, forever.
Finally, I caved, and have created this little blog, to finally put into writing a collection of all things Mario.

You may think it's funny, you may not even get it. Just know that your quality of life would be improved greatly if you ever got to experience his presence.

‎"What do you think about Jesus? Jesus was a man who died for a crime he didn't commit." - Submitted by Kelsey L.

And so it begins...